Page 1 | Page 2 | Page 3 | Page 4 | Back to Archives
Cathleen O'Connor |
There's the wait to see the doctor; the wait for scheduled sessions of chemo or radiation treatments; the wait to feel well enough in between to get some things done; the wait for the hair to fall out or not; the wait for biopsy results, sonograms, mammograms, surgeries, ultrasounds, MRI's and all the other tests and procedures that will indicate progress or worsening. There's even the wait, once the cancer is in remission or gone, for a possible recurrence.
With all this waiting, it's no wonder that anxiety is a major side effect of the cancer diagnosis. Anxiety is rooted in loss of control, and when we are faced with the reality that we are not in control, it is a stunning moment. Anxiety holds us prisoner in an undefined future, when our life is happening right now. In his wonderful book, Practicing the Power of Now, German philosopher Eckhart Tolle writes about the difference between clock time and psychological time. It is clock time that gets us to our appointments and through the demands of our day. It is psychological time, however, that keeps us trapped in our minds, worrying about the past and future while missing the present.
The answer is simple really. The only moment that ever really exists is the one you are in right now. The test results will be what they will be. Worrying about them won't make them come through a moment sooner or change their outcome. Giving over space in your mind to fearful thoughts just drains you of the ability to enjoy your life as it happens. It's simple, but it's not easy. To free yourself of anxiety, you must substitute the habit of painful and fearful thoughts with other, life-sustaining habits that allow you to truly live each moment you have been given on this earth. Each time you find yourself in the grip of anxiety, try this instead: |
| • |
Find a quiet space and take three calming breaths, making them as deep as you can and focusing on your breath going in and out, while your thoughts just ramble on in your mind. |
| • |
Repeat to yourself, "whatever I'm worrying about, it's not happening NOW. Right now, in this precious moment, I am alive; I am present; I am here." Just repeat this over and over – your anti-anxiety mantra if you will. Stay with that thought until you can feel your mind quiet and your body soften and begin to relax. |
| • |
Take another three deep calming breaths, get up and do something that brings you pleasure or joy – listen to beautiful music, sing, paint, write, read that novel you've been wanting to read, hug your family, take a walk with the dog. Do something life affirming. |
| • |
The way to banish anxiety is to confront it with life – life lived in the here and now – the only gift of life that we have been given. Tomorrow is truly promised to no one, but we are each promised the here and now. Don't miss it. |
Page 1 | Page 2 | Page 3 | Page 4 | Back to Archives |
|
