by Paul Coleman, Psy.D.
Imagine (it’s not hard) that you are feeling very anxious or panicked and then you feel upset and agitated that you’re feeling that way. Your emotional upset about being anxious has just added another layer of stress.The Effects of Accepting Anxiety
What if instead you could emotionally accept that you’re feeling anxious? Emotional acceptance does not mean you like it; it means that you will not emotionally oppose the reality of the anxiety you feel in that moment. Using a different example, imagine that you discover your tire is almost flat. You can emotionally accept the situation and arrange to fix it, or you can emotionally oppose the situation (get upset, angry, frantic, and so on) and arrange to fix it. Which is better?Learning to Emotionally Accept Anxiety
How do you emotionally accept your anxiety or panic? First, rate how strong your anxiety is. Notice any tension you feel, especially in your chest and stomach. Then repeat to yourself “I may not like this situation but I accept it... I accept that I’m anxious.” If you have trouble believing those words, say “I accept that I’m having trouble accepting my anxiety.”You can still try to manage your anxiety by proper breathing, relaxation, or self-talk, but instead of being emotionally opposed to your anxiety, try to peacefully co-exist with it. It is similar to the idea of “floating” with your anxiety. Let the anxiety do its thing and you do what you have to do. But don’t “fight” your anxiety or try to “beat” it. Let it be. Allow the reality of the moment (that you have anxiety or feel panicky) simply to be. And allow another aspect of that reality (that you intend to try to relax or cope with the anxiety and fear) also to be.
